186. I am disgusted with the false world. I know fully well that it is no use living in such a world. Everywhere I find misery alone. I intend to enter into the life of a Sannyasin, but I do not know where to find out a Guru. Kindly let me know what I have to do to become a Sannyasin.

You should not hate the world, but you should hate the worldly life. The world is a manifestation of the Lord. The world is the best teacher for you. The world cannot stand in the way of your attainment of Kaivalya. You must change the way of your living and viewing things. You will have to build a new mind and a new vision. Then the world will appear as heaven. You have not developed real Vairagya. It is a kind of temporary aversion on account of some mishap. You are unfit for taking Sannyas. You may fail to carry out the duties of a Sannyasin. You must ascend the spiritual ladder step by step.

I will advise you to remain in the world and do Nishkama Karma Yoga for some years to purify the heart (Chitta Suddhi). You must develop humility, the spirit of self-sacrifice, Kshama, mercy, Visva-prem. These virtues can be acquired by selfless service alone. You must have the qualifications Sama (peaceful nature), Dama (self-restraint), Sarva-sanga-parityaga (freedom from all sorts of attachments), and perfect obedience to and implicit faith in the teacher before you approach a Guru for taking Sannyas. Otherwise you will not be benefited.

187. When I know that this world is not real and I am bound to leave it one day or the other, why should I not renounce it now? Taking Pati Seva as my duty, I am doing it very sincerely and faithfully. But I know that neither Pati nor son nor father nor mother can help me in achieving the real goal. Did not Mira meet Bhagavan by leaving her husband?

For a lady, her husband is the image of God. She will have to realize God in and through him alone. She need not go to temples even for worship. Your Vairagya is a momentary bubbling. It cannot help you in any way in your spiritual progress. You may say, "This world is unreal"; but in your heart of hearts you may be attached to several objects. The Vairagya that comes temporarily out of family difficulties and troubles is like a flash of lightning. It will pass away in no time.

In what sense is the world unreal? The world is not as unreal as the horn of a hare or the son of a barren woman. This world is an empirical or relative reality (Vyavaharic Satta). It is not so real as Brahman. When compared with Brahman or the Eternal, it has no real existence. The world is a phenomenon or an appearance. Brahman is the noumenon or the absolute. The world is unreal only for a Jnani who is resting in his own Svarupa. The vast majority of persons have misunderstood the term ‘Mithya'. Hence they try to leave the world aimlessly without any discipline and without developing any virtue. This is a sad mistake. Taking the world as a mere appearance, you will have to work in the world with untiring patience without egoism, but with Atma Bhav and with a clear understanding of the noumenon or the basis of the world. If the aspirant leaves the world without purification of the heart through Nishkama Karma Yoga and without possessing the four means of salvation, he will not be benefited in the least by his renunciation.

The case of Mira is quite different. She was a Yoga-Brashta with full Vairagya, with a heart saturated with Krishna-prem from her very childhood. Your case is different. Do not draw a comparison here. You will have to evolve through serving your husband and humanity. Practice this. See the Lord Krishna in the sparkling eyes of your husband and in all faces. May God bless you!